My Stupid Suicide Plan: An excerpt from Chetan Bhagat's work

Last week, an IITian committed suicide. People who commit suicide do it when they feel there’s no future. But wait, isn’t IIT the one place where a bright and shining future is a foregone conclusion? It just doesn’t add up, does it? Why would a young, hardworking, bright student who has the world ahead of him do something like this? But the answer is this-in our constant reverence for the great institution (and I do believe IITs are great), we forget the dark side. And the dark side is that the IITs are afflicted by the quintessential Indian phenomenon of academic pressure, probably the highest in the world.

I can rant about the educational system and how it requires serious fixing, or I can address the immediate-try my best to prevent such suicides. For this column I have chosen the latter, and I do so with a personal story.

News of a suicide always brings back one particular childhood memory. I was 14 years old when I first seriously contemplated suicide.


I had done badly in chemistry in the Class X half yearly exam. I was an IIT aspirant, and 68% was nowhere near what an IIT candidate should be getting.
I don’t know what had made me screw up the exam, but I did know this, I was going to kill myself. The only debate was about method.
Ironically, chemistry offered a way. I had read about copper sulphate, and that it was both cheap and poisonous. Copper sulphate was available at the kirana store. I had it all worked out.


My rationale for killing myself was simple-nobody loved me, my chemistry score was awful, I had no future and what difference would it make to the world if I was not there. I bought the copper sulphate for two rupees-probably the cheapest exit strategy in the world.

I didn’t do it for two reasons. One, I had a casual chat with the aunty next door about copper sulphate, and my knowledgeable aunty knew about a woman who had died that way. She said it was the most painful death possible, all your veins burst and you suffer for hours. This tale made my insides shudder. Second, on the day I was to do it, I noticed a street dog outside my house being teased by the neighborhood kids as he hunted for scraps of food. Nobody loved him. It would make no difference to the world if the dog wasn’t there. And I was pretty sure that its chemistry score would be awful. Yet, the dog wasn’t trotting off to the kirana store. He was only interested in figuring out a strategy for his next meal. And when he was full, he merely curled up in a corner with one eye open, clearly content and not giving a damn about the world. If he wasn’t planning to die anytime soon what the hell was I ranting about? I threw the copper sulphate in the bin. It was the best two bucks I ever wasted.

So why did I tell you this story? Because sometimes the pressure gets too much; like it did for the IITian who couldn’t take it no more. On the day he took that dreadful decision, his family and friends were shattered, and India lost a wonderful, bright child. And as the silly but true copper sulphate story tells you-it could happen to any of us or those around us.

So please be on the lookout, if you see a distressed young soul, lend a supportive, non-judgmental ear. When I look back, I thank that aunt and that dog for unwittingly saving my life. If God wanted us to take our own life, he would have provided a power off button. He didn’t, so have faith and let his plan for you unfold. 
Because no matter how tough life gets and how much it hurts, if street dogs don’t give up, there is no reason why we, the smart species, should. Makes sense right?

Posted in Philosophy.
By The Witch – January 4, 2006

Suggested Solutions by HUMANS

People have suggested all sort of solutions.

Ban the LAN. ( Internet)

Reduce Work Load/ Academic Stress

Counseling Sessions.

Now that we have failed with the seemingly Necessary Logical Solutions. Let’s try a Human Solution!

Suicide is an Impulse Decision…
So, I don’t think we need to Subtract or Reduce anything. We need to add something to the system.
Girls. Women. ( Don’t succumb to you Impulse Judgment. Read Along)

May be all Students need ( keeping all things constant) are some Women, or Emotional Stabilizers as I call them.

Most Married Men would testify the importance of their Partner in testing times.

May be that’s why they say, Behind Every Successful Man there is a Women.

There are things men tell their girlfriends, they would never tell their best of friends.

A 2 Month old Girlfriend knows more about you than the best of your Friends.

The Truth is, People are not comfortable sharing their Secrets with even the best of their Male Friends..

1 Because you are constantly seeking their approval, Especially the ones who are closest to you.. So your best friend is often the last person you would confess your problem to.

2. Sometimes you might look upon your friends as competitors.

3. May be you don’t have a Real Friend…

So you can’t confess your problem to your Best Friend.

You won’t tell a person who don’t think is Close enough.

You can’t talk to your Parents. Very Few of us share our problems with our Parents.. For you don’t want to make them tense or let them down (Sounds almost Ironic after the eventuality though)

Who is Left ?

No Wonder None of those friends or the family Saw any of those suicides coming!!

My Guess is a Feminine Shoulder might have helped.

Maybe...Shayad..Kaash...

Which system is at Fault ?

If you choose to highlight these suicides, there are students in the same batch who have done exceedingly well..

Some may be under the same Prof, who is under the Scanner.

3 out of 5000. In Science that’s not called a System Error. That’s called Standard Deviation.

Darwin would have dismissed the same, with his “Survival of the Fittest” Argument.

You could call me Cold, or Apathetic, or Ignorant or anything you want to, but if you are really serious about ending these Suicides.

My Humble Request is Stop Glorifying Every Suicide.

For Every time a Pedestrian gets run over, it’s not always the Cars Fault. Assuming that’s it’s always a Drivers Fault is a matter of convenience. Not Fact!

May be it was error of Judgment on the Student’s Part.

Who Knows?

May be all those Students who committed suicide are regretting it now in Heaven.

May be the recent IITM guy is thinking, ” I could have waited!”

May be that Kanpur guy who jumped thought in Mid Air, “What the F*** did I do? I should have fought this?”

That Girl who hung herself, while wincing in pain on the rope, ” God I don’t want to die! Give me one more chance!”

Who is to know ? May be they are hating themselves in Heaven.

I mean, “I just couldn’t live with myself knowing I had just killed myself.”

In that Scenario would the present Arguments against system still be Valid?(hypothetical..i know)

The analysis continues.....

THE WORLD DOESN’T OWE YOU A LIVING! IT WAS HERE FIRST
An IIT K Student doesn’t get a Campus Placement. He commits Suicide.
The Argument given to his friend before ending his life was, Itni Mehnat kari, Itne number laaye.. Phir bhi Job nahin lagi! ”
Can a Hockey Player commit Suicide for the same Reason.. “ Yaar Itni Mehnat kari, Itne goal kiye, phir bhi Advertisement nahin mile! ”
Job Nahin Mili, Suicide kar li?
What bothers me is the mindset of some of the Students that IIT somehow owes them a LIVING!
No it doesn’t. Nor does the World!!
You didn’t create that Brand. Your Predecessors did. So how does IIT owe you anything?
IIT is an Educational Institute. Not a Life Insurance!

SO CALLED FRIENDS!!!
The friends of the person who committed suicide are the first to criticize the system.
I say, If you were such a good friend, why didn’t you make sure he attended the lectures, when hisattendance was getting short. why didn’t you drag him to classes ?
If he hates the classes, why didn’t you help him find what he loved doing?
He got extension because his project got delayed, Why didn’t you make his project report. If you think the system pressure can often lead to suicide.. Didn’t you see your friend’s suicide coming when he was failing in courses and missing deadlines?
In one sentence you blame the System and the Pressure, when you did nothing to help your friend though it ?
And the worst part is, none of the friends had an inkling of what was about to come!
So much for being a Friend.

The paradox behind various popular reasons for stress

Some Students blame the number of tests and quizzes in IIT.
Which is ironic because when the same Students were preparing for IIT JEE, most of them would opt for Multiple Test Series. FIITJEE, Bansal, Resonance…That time you couldn’t have enough of them!
So why have the tests suddenly become a Problem ?
You Graduated out of the same system..
People say, Oh the moment you come into IIT, there is a sense of loss of Identity. Toppers in their respective Batches are now no longer toppers.
Well the same happens when you start JEE preparation. Toppers from Various Schools, Join a Coaching Institute, where most of them no longer remain toppers…
So why are the same constants suddenly a problem.. ?


SUPPOSED CAUSES OF SUICIDES.
People Blame Academic Pressure for these Suicides.
Oh It’s too Stressful.
I ask, WHY SHOULD IIT BE EASY?
You feel you can take it, fine. Else Quit.
Everyone is fine with the Goods which IIT tag has to offer..
The Campus Placements for Majority, and the other Fringe Benefits of being an IITan. A Default Respect in the Society among other things.
So why shouldn’t you be made to earn every cent of it ?
You find the Pressure Enormous…Quit IIT!!
Do something else. Why Quit your Life?If you choose to stay in IIT ! Play by the Rules.

Why are we glorifying Suicides in IIT’s ?

IIT B Student had short Attendance in 3 courses.. CPI : 4 out of 10.

He commits Suicide.

Prof’s and System are Blamed.

IIT Kanpur Post Grad Student can’t get a Job in campus placements. He Commits Suicide.
Recently an IIT M Student gets BTP Extension. Spirals into Depression. Commits Suicide.

Prof. is under Scanner.

Let’s ask a few questions before we begin to get Sentimental about yet another Suicide ?

Should Ganguly have committed Suicide when he was given an Indefinite extension after being dropped in 92 ?

Would you have blamed the BCCI for crushing the ambitions of a 22 year Old?

But Ganguly didn’t commit Suicide. He Waited!

Couldn’t the Gentlemen in IIT M have waited too ? ( And with all due respect to IITans, even cricketers are under pressure.)
So, How is some one’s act of impulse the System’s Fault ?

Moving On…

Most students commit suicide, for getting XX grade (which means you would have to repeat the course because of attendance shortage) in 3 courses among other reasons.

Tomorrow Let’s say a Professor commits suicide for lack of attendance of students in his class. Let’s say, he got depressed for that reason.. Let’s say, he is giving his best, still no one is attending the class. Would you blame the Student fraternity in the colleges for not being serious about Studies…

Would you be willing to blame the System ( Markets in this Case) ?

Would the Student Fraternity be willing to go for all the Lectures to prevent any more Prof’s from going into Depression and any subsequent suicides?

Take your guess.

My guess is an emphatic No!!!

Professor writes a mail mentioning the list of people to be awarded Fail Grade. Student commits Suicide after finding his name in it.
Argument. The E Mail was Harsh!!
If tomorrow a Critic trashes a movie, Can the lead Actor commit suicide citing a harsh review in his defense.. Would you buy that ?

EVERY TIME A PEDESTRIAN IS RUN OVER BY A CAR. IT’S NOT ALWAYS THE DRIVER’S FAULT! 

Why are we glorifying Suicides in IIT’s ? Why are we projecting them as Victims of the System?
For somebody who takes HIS own life for a BTP Extension. I am sorry to say is a Victim of his own Choices ! ( Whatever may have been the Circumstances)
So let’s stop projecting these Students as Martyrs. For it creates a False Precedent. A sort of Suicidal Peer Pressure (Pardon the Phrase, but true) among the Students to come.
I call it the Induction effect of committing suicides.

Introduction: Why are IIT's suicide prone?

Every student who committs suicide at a renowed institute like the IIT'S dealt with severe pressures of various kinds, which are interlinked. Not getting a proper recruitment, examination stress, depression are some of the major factors. So, who should be blamed for these suicides, improper educational system, terrible stress on students in such reputed colleges or we as students who desire for higher studies in such institutes and with high expectation.

Every parent wants their child to be a topper in their class and expecting further, their child should get admission in IIT. When one enters the IIT, there is not only expectation from the parents that the student need to perform better but the student himself who has a higher self expectation being a part of the IIT.

However, to study at IIT is not everyone’s cup of tea. The study material in any of the courses is not only tough but it’s hectic for the students as well. Besides these in every semester two exams are conducted consecutively in a day, which builds a huge pressure on the students’ mind. For a major lot, even the professors seems to uncooperative, as they always try to build pressure on them in some way or the other.

The stress to maintain the reputation of being an IITian, dejected and ashamed because not many students flunk that often and the mounting stress to better and to have a good GPI or CPI is killing (pun intended).

Last but not the least the campus recruitment creates depression for students that make them emotionally weak and force them to end their lives.

Human nature is such that high self expectation creates within us an ego centric attitude, which in a state of depression fills our mind with negative thoughts and provokes for such a cowardly act of committing suicide.

An article that I read stated that suicides are because of an individual intrinsic character. It is also called copy cat suicide. In Wikipidea it has been stated, “The well known suicides serve as a model, in the absence of protective factors for the next suicide. This is referred as ‘suicide contagion’. These occasionally spread through school system, through community or in terms of celebrity suicide wave.”

With the rising suicidal rates, it can be said that today EQ (emotional quotient) is perhaps more important than IQ (intelligence quotient).